 |
Pipex |
Option 1
8Mbps (160 times faster than a dial-up connection)
Unlimited downloads
Free wireless router
£6.49 a month for first 3 months, £12.99 thereafter
For customer services call 0845 077 2455 for general enquiries.
- As part of its service, Pipex offers:
- Free email address
- 50MB of personal web space
- Free anti-virus
- Free firewall
- Backup dial up service
Option 2
- 8Mbps (160 times faster than a dial-up connection)
- Unlimited downloads
- Free wireless router
- £8.49 a month for first 3 months, £14.99 thereafter
- For customer services call 0845 077 2455 for general enquiries.
- As part of its service, Pipex offers:
- 5 free email addresses
- 150MB of personal web space
- Free anti-virus
- Free firewall
- Backup dial up service
Provider Information
- Pipex Internet Ltd. began in 1991 and is part of the Pipex Group.
- The company is one of the largest and most respected broadband providers in the UK.
- The offer phone and broadband services throughout the UK.
Visit Pipex Insurance for a quote.
» Click here to leave your review
Leave your review
Pipex is beyond belief, as with most on here I have had the worst experience with this ISP & as soon as I can get away from them, the better & I will say that never the twain shall meet again!!!! I have about 4 more weeks to wait out of the 12 I am told by CISAS I need to give them before I can go through there complaints procedure & leave pipex for good. If anyone knows of a quicker way please tell me. My whole system has never worked since I joined them, my speed is about 2mg ( though I am supposed to be on up to 8mg ) every time I receive or make a call I get kicked of the net for at least 8 minutes at a time. Plus all the other rubbish I get from them, please put me out of my pain someone.
| Posted by G.S. Dorset on the 11th June 2008 |  |
Agreed, PIPEX once were first class but now their level of customer service is disgraceful.
I've spent nearly all day trying to cancel my account and have spoken to several people based in a call centre in Manila. Most recently I spoke to a clueless operative (clearly local) going by the name of Bob!
The sooner I am away from Pipex the better. I personally plan to never deal with them again
I've spent nearly all day trying to cancel my account and have spoken to several people based in a call centre in Manila. Most recently I spoke to a clueless operative (clearly local) going by the name of Bob!
The sooner I am away from Pipex the better. I personally plan to never deal with them again
| Posted by Danny on the 10th June 2008 | |
I wish I could show you my email correspondence. Despite outlining in a massive initial email all the problems I had with their Customer Services(!!) on the phone, guess what the one-line reply email said ... please call our Customer Services department on ...!!! Has anyone defeated them? Got out of the contract by proving them to be rotten? Has anyone got a name of a director/manager/anyone who can make a difference? And why do I have to leave a minimum one-star rating? They don't deserve even that.
| Posted by Julie on the 4th June 2008 | |
Pipex are rubbish now that they have become part of the Tiscali group. I have always had a great service from them for the past 7 years, but when they migrated me onto the Tiscali platform (without my knowledge) I have had only intermittent internet access. I have now requested my MAC number - be warned: it is time to leave.
| Posted by Julia Stow on the 4th June 2008 | |
Pipex have gone from an excellent provider to dreadful. Pipex now = Tiscali since they have taken them over, speeds are awful and customer service gone to India. You'd be quicker with dial up. Believe me. Why can't I leave a review with no stars ?
| Posted by PJ on the 19th April 2008 | |
Pipex are a nightmare. Without warning they cut me off saying my debit card had expired. It hadn't and they later told me over the phone it was an internal error. Customer services have been almost non existent and always useless. I have cancelled them. In the last 3 months they have taken hundreds of pounds out of my account with no explanation. Fortunately they have breached the direct debit guarantee as they gave me no notice of withdrawing the money. Do not touch PIPEX.
| Posted by Duncan Saunderson on the 19th April 2008 | |
I have been a customer with Pipex for 3 years with very little or no problems. However, over the last 2 months, I have had nothing but problems: not being able to connect, and customer services lying by saying it's my equipment's fault, only to find out that it's their equipment that's faulty. I have had enough of unreliable connections, and toilet manner customer services. Good-bye Pipex.
| Posted by J.T. on the 16th April 2008 | |
I am a new customer; I have been with pipex broadband since Jan. They must be the worst customer service ever, as well as tiscali. I have tried to get my problem sorted since Jan, you cannot speak to some one who understands you, and they don't understand us. We need English speaking service.
| Posted by b taylor on the 11th April 2008 | |
I use these idiots at my other address. Since Tiscali took over pipex have been a complete mess. Stay well away unless you want a big tech support phone bill and lessons on how to ping the BBC's website. What is going on with the UK's website provision atm?
| Posted by johno on the 10th March 2008 | |
You are right in every way, I agree 100% you worded it prefect: they do lie, they can't back anything up they say, they fail to let you speak to management, the staff are not worth talking too, just lie and make things up.
| Posted by j fraser on the 6th March 2008 | |
They were OK before Tiscali, but then service declined. And fell through the floor when they LLU'd my exchange. But they gave me a MAC without any hassle.
| Posted by Jon Watson on the 6th March 2008 | |
Good service until Tiscali came in to the picture, now rubbish. Where's my MAC?
| Posted by Jon Watson on the 3rd March 2008 | |
I've been with them for five years - used to be world class. Now Pipex are fraudsters and criminals. The abuse of customers and of customers' bank accounts is routine and systematic. The stonewalling, the refusal to back-up assurances and guarantees in writing, the failure of management to engage with customers even when illegal and unjustifiable activities are pointed out to support staff is unbelievable.
* I understand full well the implications of making statements that use the words 'criminal', 'fraudster', etc. and chose these words very very carefully and I believe with good reason.
* I understand full well the implications of making statements that use the words 'criminal', 'fraudster', etc. and chose these words very very carefully and I believe with good reason.
| Posted by Dean Marshall on the 29th February 2008 | |
I've been with Pipex for 5 years. I did not even mind paying the extra money because I always has a fast reliable connection. However, on Feb 5th my connection dropped. This is just about the time the road leading to the exchange was dug up and new cables installed. 7 days later I found out that I have been migrated to Tiscalli LLU. I am no telecommunications engineer but I am assuming the road works were due to Tiscali installing their own equipment at the exchange. So since being switched from a reliable IPStream with Pipex to Tiscali LLU I have had no connection. I have manage to sync both my 3com router and speed touch modem to the ASDL line but can not connect to the internet. Pipex say they have sent engineers to the exchange to sort this out but can find no faults. So it's not my router/modem and pipex say it's not the exchange so does anyone know what could be the matter? I am in Appley Bridge Wigan and live less that 100m from the exchange. Any one around here having similar problems? 3 weeks still no connection.
| Posted by MH on the 28th February 2008 | |
Myself and two family members were/on Pipex/Nildram packages. Along come Tiscali and the ruin two perfectly good Broadband companies. Speeds have been slashed , weekdays and evenings, that is that you can log on. Service issues seem to beyond the helpline staff and emails to serviceline are not answered. In my opinion Tiscali are in my opinion failing to provide the surface to which I signed a contract and I also believe that there current advertising campaign could only be described as fraudulent if the service I have received in the last week since I was switched. I would urge ALL ex Pipex and Nildram customers to make a double complaint to OFCOM about there breach of contract, in not providing a service and squeezing the pipe plus over the outlandish promises made in their advertisements.
| Posted by CJ on the 26th February 2008 | |
Pipex are now the worst ISP around having been bought by tiscali, avoid them at all cost as there service has limits even though they say it's unlimited. You will get capped speeds on torrents or P2P at most times of the day and nothing you do will change this. Keep well away!
| Posted by steve on the 24th February 2008 | |
I am currently taking action against pipex for billing me for services I have never ordered and for distributing personal details (including billing information) to a 3rd party. The quality of service from Pipex has plummeted as of late and their customer service do not answer the phone. I have emailed 3 company directors and have only received one response from a secretary who fobbed me off with complete lies. Avoid them.
| Posted by Paul Dean on the 19th February 2008 | |
Pipex USED to be respected. I have been with them for 6 years and it's now time to jump ship as they've been taken over by Tiscali. Their service has become unusable and their customer service is horrendous.
I have a Pipex business account and a separate home account both close and on the same exchange.
Our business account started disconnecting constantly while increasing in speed, I spent 48 hours phoning Pipex (the business support is the same as the home) with just a recorded message saying they had high call volumes, call back later. Eventually at the end of the message there was music and I held for about 30 minutes to get some cretin telling me there was nothing wrong and to buy a new router (I am an IT technician and this is a 'Pipex business line' used for a government agency). I told him the speed was fluctuating wildly and it must be the exchange, but he didn't understand or care. I said my home account on the same exchange was had dropped from 2.2 Mb to 576k over the same period on the same exchange but he pulled the details and said I should phone back while sitting at the computer, it was like talking to air.
Next day my home Pipex account was suspended due to none payment! No mention of this when I phoned them less than 24 hours previously. The screen I got stated they had sent me emails and letters to warn me - an utter lie. I phoned Pipex on Saturday morning to restate my payment details and was told I would be reconnected in 2-48 hours! Fortunately it was 2.
I phoned again after the weekend with the intention of cancelling the business account and was told a whole different story - they were local loop unbundling (installing their own equipment in the exchange) and the connection would be unreliable for 10 days, 'the notes must not have been updated when I last called'. No warning of this on this PIPEX BUSINESS LINE. Frankly I don't care how fast it connects after this debacle and we'll be demanding a MAC code, though Pipex have LLU'd without any notice and migrating from LLU carries a charge. My home account is still connecting at 576Kbps for no apparent reason (I live less than a mile from the exchange, have a clear line, the business line is going to 6.5 Mb about a mile further from the exchange) and I will be leaving Pipex/Tiscali ASAP for a genuine Entanet ISP that does not LIE or employ incompetent staff ASAP.
I have a Pipex business account and a separate home account both close and on the same exchange.
Our business account started disconnecting constantly while increasing in speed, I spent 48 hours phoning Pipex (the business support is the same as the home) with just a recorded message saying they had high call volumes, call back later. Eventually at the end of the message there was music and I held for about 30 minutes to get some cretin telling me there was nothing wrong and to buy a new router (I am an IT technician and this is a 'Pipex business line' used for a government agency). I told him the speed was fluctuating wildly and it must be the exchange, but he didn't understand or care. I said my home account on the same exchange was had dropped from 2.2 Mb to 576k over the same period on the same exchange but he pulled the details and said I should phone back while sitting at the computer, it was like talking to air.
Next day my home Pipex account was suspended due to none payment! No mention of this when I phoned them less than 24 hours previously. The screen I got stated they had sent me emails and letters to warn me - an utter lie. I phoned Pipex on Saturday morning to restate my payment details and was told I would be reconnected in 2-48 hours! Fortunately it was 2.
I phoned again after the weekend with the intention of cancelling the business account and was told a whole different story - they were local loop unbundling (installing their own equipment in the exchange) and the connection would be unreliable for 10 days, 'the notes must not have been updated when I last called'. No warning of this on this PIPEX BUSINESS LINE. Frankly I don't care how fast it connects after this debacle and we'll be demanding a MAC code, though Pipex have LLU'd without any notice and migrating from LLU carries a charge. My home account is still connecting at 576Kbps for no apparent reason (I live less than a mile from the exchange, have a clear line, the business line is going to 6.5 Mb about a mile further from the exchange) and I will be leaving Pipex/Tiscali ASAP for a genuine Entanet ISP that does not LIE or employ incompetent staff ASAP.
| Posted by Mike K on the 3rd February 2008 | |
Like most people I thought Pipex were good, but then I found I was wrong. Been trying to connect but it won't. Never been online yet, Tech just have no idea just reading the script.
I think from this forum its the Vista problem, shall look at Microsoft site for help.
I think from this forum its the Vista problem, shall look at Microsoft site for help.
| Posted by Warren Kingston on the 22nd January 2008 | |
Completely rubbish.. I upgraded having been with pipex for years, from when it was an excellent provider with excellent Customer Services. I upgraded to 8mb broadband and things were okay for the first year, then last October/November the slowdown started every afternoon and evening down where my speed would drop from 3 to 4mb to 250 min and 1.4 max then rising after midnight. This went on a while and I contacted them and was told to try a different router, change leads, blah, blah oh! and monitor the site and also if BT had to check the line it would charge me £50... Anyway I changed routers and lead and monitored it with an online speed checker and the problem continued... I did kind of lived with the speed drop as I knew it rose at some time during the day for and use where I need the band... this was up to a few days ago when I started to get a continuous 250min with a max of 1.4mb... Like I am paying 24.99 for this. This service is basically useless like their customer service and now they have the frigging cheek to change their support line to a 10p per minute call. Anyway the issue is one of unfair trading... as far as I am concern and customers should be seeking compensation from this... they promote clearly speedy connections and deliver?
| Posted by Art Ward on the 21st January 2008 | |
I moved from Tiscali (which was absolute rubbish) to Pipex (who were excellent) several years ago. Since about the time Tiscali took over Pipex, I have had slow speeds and constantly dropping connections (sometimes within minutes of each other!). I think I will be asking for my MAC Code very soon.
| Posted by Rosemary Taylor on the 16th December 2007 | |
I agree with most of these comments, Pipex used to be great, but not they are utter useless, they cut me off by accident then expected me to pay to be connected again. Call centre is useless, and writing letters to them is a waste of a stamp.
| Posted by Andrew Spink on the 4th December 2007 |  |
In the beginning 3 years ago I would have been here telling you what a great isp Pipex WERE. For the past few months I have had nothing but disconnects, slow downloads and just a all round bad service. I used to have a constant 8 meg synced connection at evenings, now I am lucky to get more than a 1.5mb connection as of late and I can't seem to log into my mmorpg's which I am paying for. Today being disconnected for an hour put the final nail in the coffin. I have just come off the phone requesting my MAC code. Goodbye Pipex hello ZEN.
| Posted by Mark Sanders on the 19th November 2007 |  |
I signed up for the Pipex service which offered £13.99 for six months, and from the start, have been charged £19.99. Three weeks after sending a complaint, Pipex finally responded and claimed there never was such a deal - liars! I also complained to Uswitch, and have heard nothing from them either. To make matters worse, I just bought a computer with Windows Vista and the Pipex modem/software won't work.
I can't wait until the contract ends so I can find another provider!
I can't wait until the contract ends so I can find another provider!
| Posted by Tony on the 30th September 2007 | |
I cannot fault Pipex Max, it's always up and running. But customer service is rubbish! It's a real shame to see them get so many things wrong over and over again. It gets to the stage when you just can't face the 12 minutes of how they value your custom.
Even the Mac code never came, which is a shame as when you're thinking of leaving but it's not 100% then that final 12 minutes seals their fate.
Even the Mac code never came, which is a shame as when you're thinking of leaving but it's not 100% then that final 12 minutes seals their fate.
| Posted by Alan on the 17th September 2007 | |
For the past 4 weeks my friend has had no internet connection using speedtouch, pipex and vista. I have sat for hours with their technical support on the other end of the line and they have finally given up any hope but told her that the contract she made with them is bullet proof even if she never gets on line. They are even proud to tell me that she is not the only one as loads of customers are in the same boat. Unbelievable.
| Posted by Frank Poskett on the 23rd August 2007 | |
Been with Pipex for 4 years they WERE fine but since they have expanded and now have Pipex Homecall they have gone to pieces.
I have been overcharged over £40 (of which all they have offered to refund was £20 back!) as they never reduced my tariff when I was put on the new midi tariff I am now stitched up for another 12 months and cannot leave or I risk a penalty of over £200!
DO NOT ASK FOR YOUR MAC CODE THEN DON'T USE IT- if you do they'll charge £243 for leaving them & breaking your contract (even if you don't use the code and decide to stay on with them)
I used to recommend them but now I don't. Speeds seem to be getting slower. Customer service is rubbish and all they seem to want is to extort money.
I have been overcharged over £40 (of which all they have offered to refund was £20 back!) as they never reduced my tariff when I was put on the new midi tariff I am now stitched up for another 12 months and cannot leave or I risk a penalty of over £200!
DO NOT ASK FOR YOUR MAC CODE THEN DON'T USE IT- if you do they'll charge £243 for leaving them & breaking your contract (even if you don't use the code and decide to stay on with them)
I used to recommend them but now I don't. Speeds seem to be getting slower. Customer service is rubbish and all they seem to want is to extort money.
| Posted by Sharon on the 20th July 2007 | |
Disappointed I think would describe my experience of Pipex broadband, and I think Hasselhof should be considering distancing himself from the corporate logo.
Promised a stunning package by Pipex sales and was wooed into purchasing an 8meg line+phone connection, 150meg of web space and 5 email addresses. Great I thought, now I can really get the movies and music without the huge wait.... What a huge mistake. The throttling is soooo massive that it makes my old 2meg line look outstanding, even regular downloads such as the 239m byte windows 2003 SP2 file come in at a proxy 60kbs... I used to run a web server but have given that up as a lost cause due to lost connections. After reading about how pointless it is to complain to Pipex support I have decided to wait it out till the end of the contract and jump ship...
Promised a stunning package by Pipex sales and was wooed into purchasing an 8meg line+phone connection, 150meg of web space and 5 email addresses. Great I thought, now I can really get the movies and music without the huge wait.... What a huge mistake. The throttling is soooo massive that it makes my old 2meg line look outstanding, even regular downloads such as the 239m byte windows 2003 SP2 file come in at a proxy 60kbs... I used to run a web server but have given that up as a lost cause due to lost connections. After reading about how pointless it is to complain to Pipex support I have decided to wait it out till the end of the contract and jump ship...
| Posted by Phil on the 17th June 2007 | |
Im sure most of u already know... Pipex is actually tiscali..... Yep, pipex just resell Tiscali broadband...
| Posted by Shaun on the 2nd June 2007 | |
Pipex still aren't providing installation instructions or software for Windows Vista. Their installation CD worked OK on one of my Vista computers but refuses to work on another (using same modem etc), Looking on their website I found this:
"The current standard installation CD for the modem which Pipex supplies was developed before the advent of Windows Vista and therefore certain problems may be experienced when using that installation CD with the new software.
Our technical support staff are currently working to finalise the development and testing of drivers which are compatible with Window Vista in order to provide these on the standard installation CD as soon as possible."
There are no new Vista instructions or downloads available from their website - all instructions refer to XP. It's not good enough considering the length of time since Vista was released. These problems should have been sorted out and the website updated weeks ago.
"The current standard installation CD for the modem which Pipex supplies was developed before the advent of Windows Vista and therefore certain problems may be experienced when using that installation CD with the new software.
Our technical support staff are currently working to finalise the development and testing of drivers which are compatible with Window Vista in order to provide these on the standard installation CD as soon as possible."
There are no new Vista instructions or downloads available from their website - all instructions refer to XP. It's not good enough considering the length of time since Vista was released. These problems should have been sorted out and the website updated weeks ago.
| Posted by Jo on the 14th May 2007 | |
Pipex is crap! Three words is enough, all these people writing letters about their experiences - I gave up. They never respond to your complaint, even when its from a fully qualified Lawyer. Waste of space and time. I got a recomendation many years ago to use Pipex and I now wish I hadn't even heard of them.
| Posted by David Matthews on the 11th May 2007 | |
I too have made the fatal mistake of taking a broadband contract with Pipex. One month later, I still have no broadband, but I can’t cancel the contract, as I didn’t cancel by email within seven days. The thing is, as I don’t have internet access, I couldn’t cancel by email. Meanwhile, every day I phone their customer services, and every day another different story. They send out modems which are incompatible with Windows Vista, and they expect their new customers to scarabble around finding (and paying extra for ) drivers to install and use their equipment. Pipex are a joke, don’t go there!
| Posted by Teejay on the 26th April 2007 | |
Barry who said he had never had a problem with Pipex is extremely lucky. I am a victim as are several other people on here and other sites like http://www.pipexproblems.co.uk
And now they have screwed everything up, they want to sell the company!
And now they have screwed everything up, they want to sell the company!
| Posted by Pipex Victim on the 26th March 2007 | |
Pipex is Crap. I have been getting speeds of about 0.5 MBPS while my nextdoor neigbour who is on the same exchange is getting his full 8mb from another provider. Its been like this for 5 months now and BT and Pipex cant seem to figure it out. Dont go with these. A BT engineer came in once sand says dont use microfilter - I tried it but does not work at all
| Posted by Kowsar Ahmed on the 2nd March 2007 | |
Brilliant rant against the faceless corporate machine that hates the paying customer, exactly how I feel against UKO
| Posted by Ukonline Sux on the 24th February 2007 | |
I've been with Pipex 16 months. During that time they've only ever answered 1 mail inquiry out of the 4 I made, and when trying to access online invoices the pages have been down for maintenance half the time I've tried.
Several months after I joined an unlimited service, Pipex became the first UK ISP to introduce traffic shaping, which made using the already slow ed2k file sharing network useless - Pipex applied a 20% bandwidth restriction on file shares 24/7 from then on, even at night.
Having used encrypted torrents since they now want me to cut down my downloads or face having my 'unlimited' account closed.
Furthermore when you leave they require 30 days notice (even outside of a 12 months contract) and this is added to the 72 hours they take to issue a MAC code - this is a deliberate measure to ensure they can take a final month's payment off you for a service you cannot possibly use.
Several months after I joined an unlimited service, Pipex became the first UK ISP to introduce traffic shaping, which made using the already slow ed2k file sharing network useless - Pipex applied a 20% bandwidth restriction on file shares 24/7 from then on, even at night.
Having used encrypted torrents since they now want me to cut down my downloads or face having my 'unlimited' account closed.
Furthermore when you leave they require 30 days notice (even outside of a 12 months contract) and this is added to the 72 hours they take to issue a MAC code - this is a deliberate measure to ensure they can take a final month's payment off you for a service you cannot possibly use.
| Posted by Steve on the 22nd February 2007 | |
pipex --- what a joke
heard great reviews , sighned up to pipexmax on 25th dec
had nothing but trouble since , we game a lot so the unlimited was great for us ...i was wrong - they stuck us with pipex homecall and we cant game now in the week because we have used up to much gaming ----1gig a week
get notted ....im moving
heard great reviews , sighned up to pipexmax on 25th dec
had nothing but trouble since , we game a lot so the unlimited was great for us ...i was wrong - they stuck us with pipex homecall and we cant game now in the week because we have used up to much gaming ----1gig a week
get notted ....im moving
| Posted by Kerry on the 16th February 2007 | |
Have used Pipex for my mother's connection for over two years. Never a problem and completely happy.
| Posted by Barry on the 6th February 2007 | |
Customer Review of Pipex Broadband
Arrrrrrgghhhhh.
An unusual start you may think, but go any where near this lot and you too will need anger management therapy and a life time subscription with Laithwaites.
Where to start? Ah got to be customer service, or more precisely the utter lack of it. Like many companies Pipex has moved its service centre away from mainland UK.
On one of the more remote Scottish Islands, lonely and forgotten on its wooden pole, exists a sad, bakelite clad, phone. It's plaintive cries are lost in the wind swept wilderness. Occasionally, an inquisitive sheep bumps in to the post and dislodges the receiver where, much to its surprise, a voice from the dissatisfied multitude angrily shouts at it.
At other times the sheep just hears gentle snoring.
Most often, It regurgitates a favoured cud and continues with its slow and aimless mastication, pondering the world and the significance of the little shiny Pipex customer service agent badge that someone once pinned on it
I have tried to converse with the sheep. Trust me its not worth it.
Must be time to talk about billing now. Now traditionally, you subscribe to a service, provide continuous authority on your card, plug in the bits and shoot off to the nearest free porn P2P server, err check on world events at BBC news. Each month the ISP bills your account as agreed. It all works brilliantly.
Not so with these fella's. Months after closing your account (mainly due to the aforementioned sheep problem) you are presented with a bill for a load payments that they forgot to take. No comms, just straight on your card. Imagine if your utility or mortgage company behaved like this.
For those with poor or under exercised imaginations, its like chomping down on a turd and piccalilli sandwich.
Pipex folks can't even follow their own payment collection procedure. “Arrgh, well Jim Lad. The pirates code is more of a guideline really.”
Until recently, I thought deadlock was a move Big Daddy may once have used on a Saturday. CISAS was a Polari phrase and Otelo, a Shakespearean tragedy. If you can compliment Pipex about anything they certainly expand your legal knowledge.
A marketing guru once told me that a happy customer, on average, will tell four of his friends about the great experience he has had. A less happy person will tell twelve people about his poor experience.
A raging holocaust of dissatisfaction, such as myself, will wonder what the Guinness Book of Records has to say on the matter and will circulate this to around the same number of people who turn up in the taxi rank before me on a wet Friday night.
(I am talking Mancunian rain here not that poncy Southern drizzle and no, the number of people is not affected by what time you leave the Pub or whether a Kebab was involved. It will always be of sufficient quantity to maximise the contest between the urgent need of a quick snake’s down a dark alley vs. the desire not to lose your approaching ride to a fat bird called Britney).
My fondest desire would be to protect humanity against the evil scourge of Pipex, whilst knocking Viagra spam off the top spot in the world’s inbox. Oh and that African bloke who wants to give me loan.
If you wish to join in the crusade to protect the world from bad advertising (Hasselhoff for God’s sake, Steven King doesn’t run ISP’s but if he did…) and crap service then please feel free to send this to anyone who can stand upright and finish a simple sentence.
Irritated of Chester
Arrrrrrgghhhhh.
An unusual start you may think, but go any where near this lot and you too will need anger management therapy and a life time subscription with Laithwaites.
Where to start? Ah got to be customer service, or more precisely the utter lack of it. Like many companies Pipex has moved its service centre away from mainland UK.
On one of the more remote Scottish Islands, lonely and forgotten on its wooden pole, exists a sad, bakelite clad, phone. It's plaintive cries are lost in the wind swept wilderness. Occasionally, an inquisitive sheep bumps in to the post and dislodges the receiver where, much to its surprise, a voice from the dissatisfied multitude angrily shouts at it.
At other times the sheep just hears gentle snoring.
Most often, It regurgitates a favoured cud and continues with its slow and aimless mastication, pondering the world and the significance of the little shiny Pipex customer service agent badge that someone once pinned on it
I have tried to converse with the sheep. Trust me its not worth it.
Must be time to talk about billing now. Now traditionally, you subscribe to a service, provide continuous authority on your card, plug in the bits and shoot off to the nearest free porn P2P server, err check on world events at BBC news. Each month the ISP bills your account as agreed. It all works brilliantly.
Not so with these fella's. Months after closing your account (mainly due to the aforementioned sheep problem) you are presented with a bill for a load payments that they forgot to take. No comms, just straight on your card. Imagine if your utility or mortgage company behaved like this.
For those with poor or under exercised imaginations, its like chomping down on a turd and piccalilli sandwich.
Pipex folks can't even follow their own payment collection procedure. “Arrgh, well Jim Lad. The pirates code is more of a guideline really.”
Until recently, I thought deadlock was a move Big Daddy may once have used on a Saturday. CISAS was a Polari phrase and Otelo, a Shakespearean tragedy. If you can compliment Pipex about anything they certainly expand your legal knowledge.
A marketing guru once told me that a happy customer, on average, will tell four of his friends about the great experience he has had. A less happy person will tell twelve people about his poor experience.
A raging holocaust of dissatisfaction, such as myself, will wonder what the Guinness Book of Records has to say on the matter and will circulate this to around the same number of people who turn up in the taxi rank before me on a wet Friday night.
(I am talking Mancunian rain here not that poncy Southern drizzle and no, the number of people is not affected by what time you leave the Pub or whether a Kebab was involved. It will always be of sufficient quantity to maximise the contest between the urgent need of a quick snake’s down a dark alley vs. the desire not to lose your approaching ride to a fat bird called Britney).
My fondest desire would be to protect humanity against the evil scourge of Pipex, whilst knocking Viagra spam off the top spot in the world’s inbox. Oh and that African bloke who wants to give me loan.
If you wish to join in the crusade to protect the world from bad advertising (Hasselhoff for God’s sake, Steven King doesn’t run ISP’s but if he did…) and crap service then please feel free to send this to anyone who can stand upright and finish a simple sentence.
Irritated of Chester
| Posted by Irritated on the 25th January 2007 | |
